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Spring breakers burn their mouths on “My Humps”  I will state this with no shame at all: I really hate the onion rings that are served at the Summit. I don’t know what it is, it might be the oversized onions inside the fried rings, it might be the fact that they aren’t cooked properly, hell it’s probably because I just can’t eat onion rings properly, but I’ll be damned if I ever admit to liking the ones at the Summit.
There’s the inevitable problem you run into if you don’t bite down all the way, where the entire onion part comes out so that all you’re left with is a long piece of onion and a hollow fried ring. The worst part is if the flapping piece of onion that’s hanging out of your mouth is really hot, because then you’re left with 3rd degree burns on yourchin. “I’m gonna get get get you drunk. Get you love drunk off my humps. My humps, my humps my humps my hump.” So are the lyrics from one of this year’s hottest singles, the subtly titled “My Humps” by the Black Eyed Peas. Yes, the beat is “off-the-hook” and what not, but what in the world do these lyrics even mean? I have come to the conclusion that this is one of the worst songs ever written in the historyof written music. I mean, just listen to it for a second, it sounds as if someone brought Porky Pig into the studio for recording advice. “A-a-a-a I think y-yy- you should ch-ch-change the title of the song to mymy- my-h-h-humps.” That can be the only explanation for a song this silly. Sure it’s a good song to dance to, but the lyrics are just so aggressively irritating. I really do think Fergie is trying to sound sexy when she’s singing the song, but can you imagine if a girl actually tried to seduce someone using these same words? “Oh baby, I can’t wait to get you drunk. For clarification it is going to be love drunk, and it will be from my humps. My lovely lady lumps.” So hot. Secondly, lumps? I’m sorry but when I hear the word lumps, the first thing that comes to mind is cancerous tissue, and the last time I checked, cancerous tissue was not in the top 10 things that guys consider turn-ons. Speaking of getting love drunk, a momentous period of time is coming upon us, the seven days of debauchery, hedonism, and alcohol that will prove an unforgettable Spring Break. Well, I suppose if it’s really that crazy and you’re doing it right, it will be forgettable. But this is the time of the year when hormonal college students from all around America throw inhibition into the wind, clothing onto the ground, and good judgment into the toilet, which as a note of interest, will also be where you will be spending a large chunk of your time.Pun intended. Of course this is a broad generalization of what kids do over Spring Break, as many will not be going to Mexico. Many will either be going home or to far off places like Tahoe, Vegas, or Los Angeles. But for those of you who are staying home over break, don’t feel bad. You can always laugh at your friends as they appear in various stages of undress on late night infomercials for Girls Gone Wild. Becausethat is quality entertainment.
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Lifestyles 
